Things I Don't Get, Starring Betty White

When I was a youngster, I was constantly annoyed by how my elders just "didn't get it."  They criticized the music I liked to listen to, the clothes I wanted to wear, and the Hollywood types that I tended to idolize. I couldn't imagine how you couldn't love Tina Turner, or why in the world you would wear some sort of below the knee skirt and sensible pumps when you could be wearing faded jeans with rips in the knees, sweatshirts and Converse high tops.  Why on earth did my mother wear panty hose when she could wear socks???!!!  And why, oh why, did my father like Engelbert Humperdink, when he could have been listening to Donna Summer?  Why did they get annoyed when I used words such as "ain't", and called them Ma and Pop, or, on occasion "Martin and Gloria".  They were so old, and so not with it.  They just didn't get it.

Alas, now I'm the one who doesn't get it.  I always thought I would keep up with changing trends in music and fashion, and yet, I stopped listening to new tunes in the mid 90s when rap and hip hop seemed to be about the only thing playing on the same station where I used to listened to Casey Kasem's American Top 40 (Number one song for 1975:  Love Will Keep us Together, by the Captain and Tenille.)  But the stuff that they call music nowadays...I mean, are you kidding me?  Yikes, I DO sound like my mother.  One of my nieces is very much into hip hop.  On the rare occasion when I can decipher the words, I admit to being appalled.  I think my parents must have objected to what they called "noise" with my music, because they couldn't understand the words, and the beat did not at all appeal to them.  But I can at least claim that I understood and knew the words to all of the songs I liked, and not one of them degraded women and used unbelievable profanity the way some of these songs do.  Well, maybe with the exception of the song:  "I Like Big Butts".

Clothing is another area where, apparently, I have advanced beyond the age of understanding as to what is relevant and trendy.  I have to admit cheering on the aged American Idol contestant who came up with "Pants on the Ground", a song he allegedly wrote because he was annoyed at the way youngsters were dressing and looking nowadays--pants so low they barely covered people's butts...crotches so low I wonder how these folks can walk without tripping and falling, a look almost always combined with a baseball cap, either backwards or crooked in some way.  And some of the women I see on campus here, dressed up for a big night out, might as well not dress at all.  Sometimes I wonder how it took so many hours to prepare and dress for a formal dance, when most things that should be covered just aren't.  Not so long ago, I was at Mass, and the young teen in front of me was wearing a very short, tight shirt and very low rise jeans.  So, I could see not only her tramp stamp tattoo on the small of her back, but also, the top of her lovely g-string, along with the tippy top of her butt crack.  Sort of hard to meditate on the Sacrifice of the Mass when I'm looking at a turquoise g-string and a "juicy" tattoo.  And I can't tell you how many times I've walked across campus seeing the guys with their pants halfway down to their knees, showing me their polar bear boxer shorts.  I love polar bears, I have to admit.  I just don't want to see them on some 20 year old's underwear.  When did it become not only acceptable, but even fashionable to show underwear in public?  Was there an announcement that I missed?  If this is to be the new style, I definitely need to go shopping.  I guess I need to get some cute stuff if I have to show it in public.

I don't even want to get started on the whole body piercing trend.  I'll just leave that alone, other than to say it looks painful and creepy.

This past weekend, Betty White was the guest host on Saturday Night Live.  Having no life of my own, I was actually looking forward to staying in on Saturday evening and watching it. I love Betty White--from the time she was salty Sue Ann Niven on the Mary Tyler Moore Show to her innocent, naive, yet hysterical portrayal of Rose on the Golden Girls.  She is a brilliant comedic actor, with amazing timing and cleverness reminiscent of Lucille Ball.  In regards to Saturday Night Live, though, I gave up watching years back.  Either I grew out of it, or it just legitimately became too crude and unfunny--I'm not sure which.  I do sometimes question my ability to determine what is relevant and meaningful to modern society.  I used to think that Saturday Night Live was fresh and funny; maybe radically so, and I never used to miss it.  Of course, that was in the days of Chevy Chase, John Belushi, Jane Curtin and Gilda Radner.  Later on, I enjoyed Dana Carvey and those that came along with him. The most shocking thing I remember was the phrase:  "Jane, you ignorant slut."   Mild by today's standards.  As time went on, SNL evolved into a show replete with crude skits that made shocking reference after reference about sex in order to get a laugh.  I ceased to see the humor in it, and decided that going to sleep was a better use of my time.

I'm no prude, but this past Saturday, I was totally disappointed in Betty White's appearance on SNL.  I know that White has the penchant to be a bit risqué in her comedy, so I was not expecting the innocent humor of the 1950s.  Still, instead of taking advantage of a brilliant comedian, SNL sunk low, writing skits that were base and vulgar.  Every production, save one, used White's advanced age, combined with sexual jokes and innuendo in order to get a cheap laugh from the audience.  One of the shorts was so vulgar that I actually found myself feeling offended, even repulsed, and also quite surprised that Betty White would agree to take part.

But then, the following day, I heard from many of my younger family and friends who thought that SNL and Betty White's appearance was funny.  Stories abounded online claiming that Betty White "killed" on SNL.  It was the highest rated show in a year and a half and, apparently delivered more laughs than those past shows.  And so I said to myself:  "I guess it must be me who just doesn't get it."  Jude, maybe you're just getting old.